Sitting up in bed, I turn around to see him sleeping deep. I hope the valium will work its magic till I return. Kick off my portofuss, I tiptoe to the kiddies room. Charles was a very good reflection of me but his second- Chelsea looks so much like her dad and I pray with all my heart she’ll take to his character.
Wigs in place and glasses on, I stroll round to my hideout- claimed studio. Behind a big canvass, I push my Kawasaki ninja out all the way to the 3rd street and then mount it. All of a sudden I heard that voice again ‘welcome horny, we’ve been expecting you’. I rode off into the cold pleasures of the night.
My 3rd victim was pretty drunk. She fell on me like if I’m her protector, licking her face, tasting the sweet sweat as my face suddenly realized he has been watching. Flirtatiously I call him with my eyes. He responds with a lick of his lower lips. I laugh out loud in the rowdy club filled with sweet lustful sin. Next he was by my side, licking my neck as I smooch on her already swollen lips, his hands on my hard nipples, squeezing hard.
‘My place or yours?’ he whispered and I laughed; ‘do you have a car?’ he nodded hurriedly and led the way. I pulled on her, laughing all the way to the door as I grab the body guard and smooch him ‘thank you’ as I always do. The cold breeze hits my face as from nowhere, I hear him say ‘mummy please don’t!’ the shock left my face as another breeze hits it and at that second I knew my mistake had been the twins. No it couldn’t be; they always put a smile on my face, a different one from what I’m having as he rams my behind. A different one as I chew her under. I scream in terror-‘it’s not fair, why can’t I have the best of both worlds, why is heaven and hell such enemies?’
I feel her fingers tear deep on my bare back as she releases all the highness on my face in pleasure, he turns me round and sticks his stink into my mouth and I mount my lips on her breathe, her cold tongue worked magic as I expected. I swallow my taste, enjoying every horror from his erect ego. Their faces appear again, this time as babies, as they take their first step with his voice saying- ‘they’ll be as sweet as their mum, so pure, so gentle’. I scream out in pain-filled-fear. ‘What have I done to myself? Who is this nightmare that appears in the day and is called pure and gentle? She can’t be me, I’m the hedonist, the servant to painful pleasures; the lover of lustful, demented sex how can I be pure and gentle’?
He screams out as he cums in my mouth, the cold salty cream hits a cord as I cum in utmost pleasure. Why can’t ‘he’ be this adventurous? Why should love be so cagey? Why is marriage only sweet to the lips and not like the craziness of a single bed? I hear her mourn from underneath my wet swollen lips; Reality hits as I hurriedly clean and dress up.
‘Hey, can I get your number…What should I do with her?’ where the words that glide by as I rode off like the beast that has taken over my being. Bike hidden, cloths off, I look at my naked body as I feel my nipples harden from the night’s pleasure. Suddenly, I notice my fingers, I lick the circle on the 4th as a tear drop down, ‘I can’t be a mum, I can’t be a wife, it’s all a trap, a dream’ more tears as I take the wig off my head and flush it down the toilet. Raising head back to the mirror, I wipe the tears and again, I see the circle on the 4th finger as I hear that voice again ‘Mum, is that you?’ I shake it off my head as I open the mirror closet and take out my rings behind the valium. I smile at sight and close mirror as I hear the voice again ‘Mum?’ this time the fright in the voice made me turn round.
It all came down on me like lighting- the fear, the shame, the pain and the FREEDOM. How long has she been standing there and how much did she see? I see tears run down her face as she let out a big SCREAM saying ‘it has always been you hasn’t it, you lied to me mum, how could you’?
My childhood flashed before me at that second as the feel of déjà vu creped on me like a demon devouring my soul!